By Mark David Blum, Esq.

Before she left, my sister and I shared some very heavy hearted and sad emails about what it was with which we were both dealing. Of late, she had been trying to reach out to him and described him to me in the moments before she boarded her plane as being, “I know how you feel but I can also say that he is the only adult/parent person in my life that has ever been genuinely nice to me and accepted me the way I am. This came many years later, but I had that with him this past few years."

For seventy two hours, I have held my breath. Having seen people in their last hours of life including after kidney failure, I knew the sight awaiting my sister was going to be horrible. She did not call. In fact, I did not hear from her until she landed back home in California this Saturday night. My calendar is cleared and I am packed and prepared to leave for a funeral on a moment’s notice.

Then came the following email exchange.

Me: PROMISE me you will make sure I get enough notice to be at the funeral. Nobody has to talk to me and I just want a few moments alone with the casket.

Her: As soon as I know, I will let you know.

Me: I have visited people in the hospital in his condition and I can only imagine how hard yesterday was for you, I worried about you all day and wondered how you were doing. I struggled all day with wondering what he thought in my obvious absence. I also hoped you might call. Did you get a chance to talk to him? Did he say anything? Is he at peace and comfortable?

Her: I read your emails and had a few giggles. Especially the part about how mom should look in the mirror.

Here is the update:

He will apparently be buried in laguna beach and that's where the funeral is supposed to be. He wants to be buried next to his last wife in Laguna in which his current wife will see through. You ask how I am doing and I am doing great! The man is not a father, parent, man or human. Why in gods name would you waste another second giving him the power you give him?

He is an alcoholic and drug addict and a self absorbed living person practicing the 7 deadly sins daily who will die alone. I think you will be the only relative showing up at his funeral.

I will say that I went to see him and got to witness in person for the very last time just what a non-human he was. He could care less about anybody but himself and if he can't use you or get anything from you he's not interested. I truly got the last laugh and we parted with him still thinking that I am that nai've little girl who he will continue to call and shoot the breeze with and will be sad when he leaves this earth and truly the jokes on him. I could care less. I played the game and won!!

I do however think you should get on your knees and thank god for the divine intervention. If you did grow up with him you would have been alot worse off today, more so than you think. I am soooo very grateful that god was looking out for me and kept me far away from him at least until I became an adult.

Her, again: Oh, p.s. he's not dying this week so you have some time to catch the show. If you feel the need for closure go catch the second act in Cleveland. Why wait till the funeral. At least you'll get some giggles if you see him in person as opposed to when he's in a casket.

Me: Common sistah, gimme some details on the trip and the visit. In one email before you go, you say he was the only person to treat you as an adult with no past baggage. After you get home, I get an email referring to him as a non human. Please let me in and help me understand.

Her: I did not go there thinking this would be my reaction, but as soon as we drove up to his house, and I saw him standing there fully clothed including a leather jacket with whiskey in one hand and a cigarette in another it hit me like a ton of bricks that this person is a manipulating, controlling freak show.