By Mark David Blum, Esq.
In keeping with tradition, once again our State budget is late. Being ‘Spitzered’ on the eve of the budget finalization could be a valid justification for the delay. Still, because the issue is not yet settled, this is my plea to my legislators to get off my butts.
Stop balancing budgets on my butts. Buried in the multi-billion dollar budget is a near doubling of the cigarette tax. Though they consume tax dollars faster than starving pigs, using cigarettes as a means to raise revenue shows a disheveled mind is behind balancing the budget. Kicking smokers out of every where and punishing them with oppressive taxes is nothing but a form of economic prohibition. Canada once tried raising taxes massively on cigarettes and the end result was a rise in smuggling and illegal cigarette sales.
I do not accept the argument the taxation is a means to control social behavior and eradicate smoking. First, it is nobody’s decision but my own if I smoke. Second, nobody but me has the right to change my behavior or even pass judgment thereon.
Most importantly is that the tax itself is self-defeating. By raising the price so substantially, some folks are going to quit smoking or buy cigarettes elsewhere thus defeating the goal of using the tax for fundraising. If people quit smoking because of cost, the revenue raising concept has failed and the budget will fall short. Some people will turn to crime as the cost of cigarettes reaches beyond their poverty levels. Like our other 'drug war', the cost of crime associated with this new tax will quickly consume any revenues generated. Given the cost of crime and incarceration, the question becomes whether that $1.25 extra is worth the stresses it will put on society.
My belief is that this has nothing to do with cigarettes and everything to do with those citizens who choose to smoke. Thanks to a good educational system, our society has finally reached the point where we not only recognize smoking is dangerous but we shun it and those who use the drug. It is only a matter of time now before cigarettes are on the DEA list of banned substances. From where then will the pork barrel spenders draw their dollars? “Sin” taxes help moralists and religionists ease their consciences by bringing down the mighty hammer of the Lord upon those who would choose to sin. We want smokers to quit. Excuse upon excuse is made to legally justify enforcement of this simple edict. Frankly, the decision is not the State’s to make.
The impact that a smoker has upon the nation’s health care system is de minimus compared to the crushing weight that fat people bring down upon the system. Britain has recognized the true strain on its health care system and is implementing a "fat tax" on salty, sugary and fatty foods. We have long advocated a fat tax. Obviously we have to except big boned people but there are not that many big bones in your ass so perhaps the Fat Tax should focus on the circumference of our rear ends. Since fat people can afford all those Big Macs and Twinkies, they can kick out a few more pennies to collectively help society carry the burden of their weight around.
What I do not understand is why we are beating each other over the heads with taxes, insurance, and ostracism as we struggle through the confusion. If I smoke, my medical insurance premium is higher assuming I can get any insurance at all. Life insurance premiums are obnoxious in comparison to a non-smoker. The combined taxes on my drug equal to more than half the cost of the product. Yet, only regular sales tax applies to a bag of Doritos.
Let us not forget too that Congress is intending on raising tobacco taxes. The purported purpose of this massive tax increase wass to fund children’s health care at the rate of 61 cents per pack of cigarettes and up to $10.00 per cigar. Though the plan failed once, the Nanny Staters are still in control of government. Make no mistake, the attempt will be made again; just in time for the elections.
The fundamental reason why we should so strongly oppose using taxation of tobacco to raise revenues is that we wish to retain for ourselves that very same freedom as fat people or skiers. Breaking a leg skiing is a lifestyle choice and we all share the costs of medical treatment and lost productivity. We want the opportunity to break our leg, clog our arteries, or fry our brain. It is not necessary that we do, but to deny ourselves mutual help and protection for doing so limits to a great extent the freedom we all enjoy. How about a skiing tax; $50.00 for every ski run, $35.00 for every snowboard.
Before I go further, I want to make it clear that some of my best friends are fat people. A lot of them are pretty cool. I have found they are just as kind and honorable and intelligent as are skinny people. Tolerating their Twinkie stained teeth or the stank of cooking grease on their clothes can at times churn my stomach but I do not object to working with them or dining with them or when I have had too much to drink, having sex with them. Recent medical news suggests that a sedentary lifestyle is healthier. Because there are so many fat people, one can only assume they are seen by many as beautiful and worthwhile. I know I do. If they were not, we would have bred them out long ago; as they did in Beverly Hills.
What really brings me to a boil is the greater hypocrisy in society. Fat people and smokers make the perfect example of how we have gone berserk in our thinking. We banish smokers, we tax them as hard as we can, they are looked down upon, frowned, ignored, disregarded, and considered “dirty” amongst the general population. At the same time, America is SUPERSIZING up for the new millennium. Airline seats are growing larger. So too are movie theater seats, household and office furniture, and automobiles. More food, fry it well, slather it with something, and don’t forget dessert. We use smoker’s dollars to feed, house, and heal these behemoths of our species.
Addiction is nothing more than an excuse. I choose to put that cigarette to my mouth. Only from my pocket can come the fire that burns away the cilia in my lungs. Same too with a Big Mac; unless there is a gun at your head, you are the one taking that next bite of mouth-watering savory deliciously greasy salty fatty carb-loaded machine-separated animal parts. You choose to spend your two free hours per night in front of the television instead of running laps around the block. The same rule applies to alcohol, heroin, and crack. We all make choices in our lives; not all are productive. It is simply ludicrous to blame the drug, the casino, or the Twinkies for our actions. Worse still is to use taxation to have everybody behave the same, live the same, consume the same. In a nation of 330 million souls, this is an impossible and irrational goal.
The day we accept this principle will be the day we move forward intellectually as a species. There will never come a time of absolute uniformity. Nobody can live a perfect lifestyle where everything done is for the betterment of the mind, body, and soul. Even if you did manage to perfect this ideal, still one day you will get very sick and die. Assuming you are not first hit by a bus. They say (whoever ‘they’ are) such a lifestyle is the goal for a longer more satisfying life. A point is made, however, that the years gained come at the end of your life. Personally, I would prefer the extra ten years or so to be between my 20’s and 30’s. Giving me my 80’s and 90’s may or may not be such a good idea depending on my savings and physical condition. It could be a living hell.
Liberty and freedom are at the core of what we believe. If we love our fellow man, then we should step aside and let people enjoy that liberty; even if the decisions made are stupid. The stupidity we protect is our own.
Let the porkers in government starve before they come to feed upon my butt. Without massive spending cuts in their budget, the real buttheads are in Albany thinking a cigarette tax is going to save their ass and job. Nothing could be further from the truth. Smokers may have stained teeth and smelly clothes; but we do have long memories and will remember at election time.
