By Mark David Blum, Esq.
You first notice it as a slight change in the air. Then suddenly, the environment all around you is clogged with the putrid stench of rotting garbage. While it may seem you are downwind from the local landfill, it takes but a moment to cognize that the offensive source is Ann Coulter’s vagina.
Face it folks, Ann Coulter is nothing but the skanky-ho-playboy-centerfold-Anna Nicole-wannabe for the far right closeted masturbators. She markets her looks and her mouth. Even Bill Maher was blown back into his corner. At her center, however, Ann Coulter is nothing but a vagina with long blonde hair who has found a market willing to listen to her aging flapping lips and the ugliness that spews forth therefrom. After being busted for illegally voting in the national election in Florida, Coulter’s vagina and her driveling monologue disappeared from the public eye. All that cash from her last book provided a very nice pad for both Coulter and her vagina; cushioning the long draught of silence. But suddenly, another skank was cumming to the fore; Michelle Malkin. Using the same marketing plays as did Coulter, the young Malkin became the new Con-Ho-Du-Jour and had pushed the Coulter vagina off the national stage.
There can only be one right wing skank Queen. Ann is a smart girl and knows well how to use her vagina to get back in the nation’s face. Just this past weekend, Coulter refreshed her monologue at the Conservative Political Action Conference. Anybody was who anybody in the Reactionary Right was present. When the fair haired vagina came on stage, she resorted to her usual gyrations. Among them was referring to former United States Senator, Presidential candidate, Vice Presidential nominee, and man who has given so much of his time and money for the benefit of his community, John Edwards, as a “faggot”. At first feigning shock, the cons all applauded and laughed.
So here we go again. One blathering old blonde whose vagina has probably been empty since the Eisenhower Administration is using her sexuality to market obscene insulting sexually charged insults at John Edwards. She does this for one reason only: So old ugly rich white men will pay her money to make them horny and laugh. What better defines a skanky ho?
I personally bear neither Ms. Coulter nor her vagina any malice. Though I would not want to dine with either or call them friends, that does not compel me to wish them evil. Like any of us, she is entitled to her opinions, she has a fundamental right to make a living, and so long as she doesn’t commit any more felonies, she should she able to show off her vagina to anybody who wants to see it.
It doesn’t take much to “get” Ann Coulter. Her game, like the rest of us, is to sell herself. She has found that marketing her vagina and spewing forth rotting outrage from her lips is something for which people are willing to pay. Obviously, she wants the fat ugly white guys who run and dominate the republican and theological party of god to be paying attention to her. All she has to do is thrust her vagina in their face and accuse liberals of being godless and the coins roll in. Ann needs to do little more than flash a camel toe at the same time she calls 9/11 widows ‘attention whores’ and she is loved. Calling John Edwards a “faggot” was just one more way for Coulter to waggle her vagina and stuff her bank account with cash.
From my perspective, Ann Coulter and her vagina should just dry up and go away. If the last national election proved anything, it is that we are tired of the blood and tired of the stench and tired and getting fucked over by Theocrats and Republicans. Americans have concluded that Coulter and her vagina are no longer relevant or interesting and it is time for them to go the way of all old ugly worn out vaginas.
No matter where she ends up or how much attention people pay to Ann Coulter or her vagina, in my opinion she is now and always will be a dick.
